Quit the Dramedy During Covid

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JESUS lay a hand! Just when I thought a nice stay in quarantine would keep us safe from the train wreck that is Ian “look at me” Alleyne, I was dead wrong.

Like pretty much everyone else I watched him tear through the Caura Hospital with his usual theatrics accusing the Government, failing to keep his story straight and in general being a menace.

Alleyne claimed he was tested negative for Covid-19, discharged papers were signed, only for another test result to come in positive!

Ahhhh!! It’s a conspiracy to keep a good man down! The Government and the crime lords they protect are trying to silence our nation’s only beacon of truth!


Naturally Alleyne called his partner and ghost whisperer extraordinaire Gerald “the protector of democracy” Ramdeen to save him. This led to a barrage of legal threats, habeas corpus, unlawful detention and lots of bumping gums.

And then…just as soon as it started it ended.

TT’s newest heart throb and most beloved Chief Medical Officer Dr Roshan Parasram, rolled those dreamy eyes of his and said:

Woa! Woa! Mash yuh brakes pardner! You ARE POSTITIVE for Covid-19. You will be kept in quarantine. There is no plot against you and truthfully speaking no one is particularly enjoying your company. You staying here is more of a pain to us, than it is to you. Bubble down, pee and go in yuh bed.

So Ramdeen sadly withdrew his legal letters, not before sending Alleyne an invoice I am sure.

Deep breaths, Alicia, deep breaths.

During this five minute dramedy, we saw a bunch of big mouths jump up and accuse the Government and CARPHA of faulty tests, mistreatment of patients and creating distractions to hide their inadequate handling of the pandemic.

Firstly, the only distraction is the one being caused by Alleyne and Ramdeen. Especially by Ramdeen who forever finds himself the lawyer of choice for self-entitled Covid-19 patients who think they are too good for the facilities being provided by the Government.

Listen, I can imagine how hard it is to be stuck in a hospital or some other facility away from the comforts of home while left in a state of uncertainty, but just zip your lips and be thankful you are getting three meals a day provided for you.

The big argument from a lady who was fighting her quarantine was why she couldn’t just be allowed to self-quarantine in her own home. I mean she promised to stay inside, so shouldn’t she be allow to do so.

Ermm…girl, no!

And let me tell you why. We Trini’s have zero self-discipline. Even if you are keeping your butt at home, at some point that family member/friend who is dropping groceries etc at your door, will “chance it” and BAM! Everyone is infected!

Yes, yes there may be those few who will actually abide to self-quarantine guidelines, but judging from the residents of Brooklyn in Sangre Grande your neighbours might not be too thrilled.

That in itself would cause more drama, more legal letters and if you want your neighbours burning tyres in front of your house, be my guest. Generally though, it is a headache no one wants.

Now for those who are left questioning the reliability of CARPHA, here is a brief lesson…

The test determines if you have the virus by the presence of its genetic material in the body and cannot confirm if the virus is active or if it’s dead.

A false negative can happen if not enough genetic material was collected in the nasopharyngeal swab.

A false positive occurs if old immune cells that have the virus trapped in them (known as viral litter) are dispelled via coughing etc before the test; the test will pick up the genetic material and come back positive, even though the virus is dead and no longer active.

This is why health experts all over this blessed earth are insisting upon re-testing. So yeah no, it has nothing to do with CARPHA or with conspiracies, it’s just science folks… you’re welcome.

So let’s be reasonable here, just keep washing our hands, practice social distancing and ignore the tragic comedy of Ian Alleyne.

Stay safe and stay strong TT. I’m out!



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