Capybara Interview- Part 2

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Alicia Chamely
By Alicia Chamely

A YOUNG Capybara barreled through the streets of Port of Spain on Wednesday September 14, 2022.

His presence and the circumstances that led him away from his native wetlands to the concrete jungle of the Brian Lara Promenade captivated the nation.

I, on behalf of AZP News, sat down with the young mammal days after his visit to town to discuss the events that led up to his early morning Port of Spain galivant.

Since that interview was published on September 17, 2022, people are aching to know, “Where is Armando Cedeno Santo Carlito today? It’s been over a year, is he still at the nature reserve in El Socorro? Did he ever reunite with his pot hound partner in crime Skegs?”

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It took some time, but AZP managed to track down Armando and he was generous enough to grant our
organisation yet another exclusive interview.

Here is the update on Trinidad’s favourite Capybara Armando Cedeno Santo Carlito. “Aye, long time I eh see all yuh! Hum girl like dat Christmas food treat yuh good! Doh worry it get yuh tic in the right places! I kidding, I kidding!

“Yeah, but last time we talk I was in love. Real love with a bess ting and she mash me up bad, bad. Turn out while I planning to marry she, she checking a next man. Wait not even a man, nah. An Agouti! I eh know what unholy cross species game dem was playing but I eh want none a dat.

“After tings sour, I leave the nature reserve and head back to the swamp to check Mami, but when
I reach back, Mami have new man! Telling me dis meh new faddah. Stueps. I eh calling no man Pappi.

“I was feeling loss yes. I say lemme go down to meh happy place, the landfill, and das where I meet Hercules.

“Hercules is one ah dem pig dat roam in de Beetham landfill. But man eh no regular Beetham roamer,
dat fella is de king of all a dem pigs in dere and dey bad. Yuh realise Trini who could eat anything eh mess with de Beetham pigs? Is cause dem eh easy.

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“So, Hercules take meh in, make me feel like family. Show me all de bess places to find a box ah dead or some out of date snacks dat apparently isn’t good enough for allyuh humans. All de other pigs nice, nice to me. Man I feeling like is the family I never had oui!

#“Den one night Hercules come ask me to do him a favour… apparently dere is an old piper named
Reginald who have a camp in the south west corner of the landfill and giving de pigs some pressure. He need me to come with him and some fellas and deal with dat ole fella.

“Listen, I know dis was gonna be a mad scene. A serious turf war. But at this point Hercules is like de
Pappi I never had. Dis fella show me real fatherly love and respect. How I go tell him no?

“So, one night, de pigs and I roll out to find Reginald. We moving quiet, quiet. We taking dis fool out!
“Boy! Ooo goooooouuuud, it happen so fass yes. Regniald come out he tent with a cutlass and swing dat
blade faster dan de speed of light! I watch one of de pigs, a fella dey used call Ham, get turn into chops!
“But Hercules he eh back down and I not either, daz until he corner us and daz when I learn about who
Hercules and dem hogs is.

“Reginald have us in a bind, cah move nowhere, dat blade swinging and voooop I feel a push. Hercules
and dem pigs push meh towards de blade, use me as a distraction and bolt outta dere.

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“Lord faddah, swoosh, I feeling heat in meh ear. De man lick meh ear clean off meh head! I only saying, ‘Oh God dis it for true, I go dead tonight!’

“And as I was waiting for dat blade to come back down on me, I hear Regniald scream!

“Is Skegs! Where he come from! Man, Skegs bite up da fella inno! I scramble up and Skegs and I bolt… we shame Usian! Dat old pot hound save me life!

“Well, we ride out of dere fass, fass. Skegs take meh back to swamp and we have a serious talk nah. Skegs turn he life around, man is a man of the Lord now. He get adopted by Christian family and he does come try to mentor the landfill youth. Keep dem on de straight and narrow. Mad respect for dat fella.

“I was inspired, so I go home to Mami, I apologise…I still eh calling she man Pappi, but I does be respectful. I keeping to myself these days, outta de landfill. Swamp life is a calm life. Is not de city, is not de landfill, but is good. And my poor decision-making self, eh meant to leave.”

Have a happy new year, filled with lots of love and laughter!
Yours Truly,
Alicia

Related stories below:


https://azpnews.com/my-interview-with-a-capybara/

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