Covid-19 injection. Azlan Mohammed/AZP News
HEAR ye! Hear ye! I wish to inform you all that I, Alicia Louise Llanos Chamely, have received my first dose of the Astra Zeneca Covid-19 vaccine this past Monday! This naturally makes me better than you!
Since being microchipped… I mean vaxxed, life has been on the up and up!
My skin has never looked better. It’s glowing… literally. Put me in a dark room, and I give off an ethereal glow.
I am forever with WiFi signal! My devices have automatically connected to network named Subject051185… hey that’s my birth date! What a wonderful coincidence! I like to joke that I am now a walking hotspot.
Speaking of walking! Last night I had the strangest dream; I walked to the Savannah at midnight and joined with my fellow glowing vaxxed brothers and sisters. We broke into a beautiful chant about devoting our lives to the New World Order! It was magical. When I woke up my feet were oddly muddy. Ha! Ha!
And my hair! Oh wow! Never has it been it so thick and lush. Funny thing is whenever I stand next to the microwave it sticks straight up, kind of like a troll doll. But still, so much volume! And my greys have practically disappeared!
The only down side is a mild ringing in my ears. It isn’t too problematic as it is easily soothed by this wonderful playlist of Bill Gates discussing his plans, and theories for mankind that was automatically downloaded onto all of my devices.
“Call, and I shall answer, my Microsoft Master”
Whoops sorry that comes out every now then. Ha! Ha!
All giggles aside, when Minister of Health Terrance Deyalsingh removed the age limit on vaccines and opened them up to people with underlying conditions and I got an appointment, it was like Christmas morning!
My husband and I both have underlying conditions, the thought of getting Covid and possibly leaving our two little womb fruits orphaned, were enough for us to cast doubt aside and get our jabs. Also we believe in science, so getting vaccinated was never not an option for us.
The process was easy, painless, and I walked out of the Tacarigua Racket Centre with a sense of relief and a sprinkle of hope that maybe we can pull out of this vortex of pandemic misery.
It is disappointing that so many people still fail to recognise the importance of being vaccinated. It is even more disappointing that the people who hold false ideas and beliefs about the vaccine tend to have the loudest voices.
So let me clear some things up. The Covid-19 vaccine won’t make you immune to the virus. What it will do is ensure your body knows how to fight it. It prevents the need for hospitalisation and can prevent severe co-infections such as pneumonia, which is really what kills people.
Up-to-date research has shown that even if you have received just one dose of the vaccine, your odds of being hospitalised or becoming severely ill are substantially lower than if you were not vaccinated at all.
If you are vaccinated and catch the virus, your ability to spread it is cut by over 40% with one dose of the vaccine. This means if enough people are vaccinated, the transmission of Covid-19 is severely hampered. No one can blame you for being a super spreader.
Getting the vaccine is not only about protecting yourself, but protecting those around you who for health reasons cannot get the vaccine themselves.
As for side effects, besides one night of body aches and a mild case of the shakes (all totally normal immune reactions) I was fine.
That 0.004% chance of developing blood clots, I will admit is worrying. So for the next two weeks, I’ll monitor myself for any symptoms. But I will tell you this; you have a higher chance of developing clots from the Covid-19 virus than from the vaccine.
So here me out, please go and get the vaccine when you can. No one is trying to kill you, brain wash you, track you.
Do you like being locked down right now? I don’t. And we can blame everyone and everything, but unless we truly begin to take personal responsibility and take the steps needed, we will never return to normalcy.
Stay home when you can, avoid crowds, wear your mask, wash your nasty hands, don’t pick your nose and get your tail vaccinated. Call me, I’ll come hold your hand if you need.
I promise you, getting that inoculation card and seeing you are one step closer to getting out of the pandemic is an amazing relief.
Lastly if you have received your vaccination, keep your hot foot cool for a bit, you are not quite yet a virus immune super human…there are limits. We need more people vaccinated, so encourage those around you.